6 Best Tips for Effective Parenting

All parents want their children to be happy, contented and successful in their respective lives. What we could not achieve in life, we want that our children must get it in their lives. By their success, we always mean materialistic success and by their happiness we always mean by temporary happiness associated with material gains. What we fail to understand is that, materialistic success is not the real success and may not lead to true happiness. Success has some deeper meaning associated with it. If as parents, we really want our children to be happy, successful, satisfied and balanced individuals, we should go through the following points and introspect ourselves and evaluate if we are on the right track.

• First & foremost point to remember is that we should never compare our child with other Children. Comparison always brings dissatisfaction. When we compare the two things or two individuals, we limit ourselves to the thing or the individual which is better. Never compare your child with other children because it will limit the unlimited. Every child is unique and has his own special qualities and unlimited potential. He has his own strengths and weaknesses. He may be excellent in one thing but extremely bad in the other. We have to accept our child as and how he is. Neither we should tell him about his weaknesses again and again to improve him nor should we boast off his strengths because both these things will only push him down. Rather, what have to do is to nurture and polish his strengths furthermore and support him with his weaknesses to unlock his possibilities for a bright and successful future.

• Children are prone to make mistakes but punishment is never a solution. It is just a way to settle something which is not settled inside of our hearts. It always brings harshness and spoils the parent-child relation. But it does not mean that as parents you will not watch or guide your children. When you are disappointed, angry or hurt, let your children know it very honestly. Be very firm, assertive and reflect it by telling them strongly that you are hurt but you should not be cruel enough to punish them.

• As parents we always want to inculcate good habits in our children. But what happens is that when we want to change their bad habits into good habits, we tell them the negative repercussions of the bad habit. Here we have to change the approach. Instead of telling the negative things about their bad habit, we have to tell the positives of good habit. For example, if our child speaks lie, then instead of telling him that if you tell a lie, I will punish you or God will punish you, We can always say that if you speak the truth and don’t lie, you will feel good and confident and God will bless you.

• We should always give some freedom to our children and should not insist them to do what we like or choose for them. As within everyone is some form of creativity that can grow in any direction. After all being successful in life is not merely to earn and acquire but to feel happy and satisfied deep within. So if a child feels happy in playing tennis and has a passion for the game but his parents want him to become a doctor or engineer and they pressurize him to pursue that line then they are actually not watering his seed of creativity. Then how will the flower of real success and happiness bloom in the life of their child. He may earn good amount of money but happiness with success will only come when he will choose the profession of his choice. A very good example, we can take from the film Three Idiots where one student wants to pursue wild life photography as his career but he is pushed into Engineering and he does not take interest and is not happy at all in pursuing Engineering and eventually he attains happiness and success, once he switches over to the occupation of his choice.

 • Sometimes, Children have to face big challenges in life. In this situation, their confidence is shaken and they tend to loose direction. This is the time when parents should pitch in and encourage them to increase their confidence and self-esteem. We have to make our children feel that no target is big and everything is possible. Inspiration given by the parents is the key to the success of their children. In their hearts, children should feel, No matter, how big their target is, with true determination and hard work and confidence; they will be successful in achieving that. Because No one is a success who does not feel successful in his or her heart.

• If we are satisfied with the life, as and how it comes to us, our children will also learn to be in harmony with their destiny. But if we are also dissatisfied and unhappy with our life and always crib about the same, when some unpleasant situation happens to come in our way, It will have a very serious effect on our child’s behaviour, psychology and his life in future. It will give him a lesson to react on everything which is not pleasant or comes in the way of his success and will distract him to from achieving the true goal of life. Children learn from what you are, not what you say. Only we are their role-models and their biggest examples in life. They will reflect our practices and our behaviour in life in some way or the other

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